7 Frequent Mistakes In Parenting
Many parents experience insecurity and anguish when it comes to raising their children. It is because doubts arise about how to give the best guidance and discipline to that being that they love so much. The most frequently asked questions are: How do I get him to obey me? Am I too strict, bossy, or too soft? Should I have punished him? To be a good parent, you must avoid frequent mistakes in parenting.
Frequent mistakes in raising children
It can be useful to know a series of mistakes that you should not make when educating your child. Taking these precautions will be important so that you do not cause them emotional damage and wounds, and they do not grow up without a direction to follow.
1. Disparity in authority
The lack of union of criteria between both parents is one of the great mistakes in parenting. Because if the child receives conflicting messages, he does not know who to obey; consequently, you will feel disoriented, without clear references.
To avoid such a situation in the child, if they are not clear about the best decision, it is recommended to say something like: ” We will talk about it later and then we will give you an answer.” In this way, they convey that the family is solid and reliable.
2. Lack of continuity
Parents should not be swayed by mood when disciplining. That is, you should not allow certain behaviors based on whether they are happy, angry, more or less tired.
If this happens, a confusing and even inconvenient message can be delivered to the infants, since the decisions would lack justification. Parents must bear in mind that education must be equanimous and rational at all times.
3. Use derogatory phrases towards children
Unfortunately, it is very common to see parents talk to children disrespectfully. For example, with expressions such as: “You are useless”, “I knew you were going to break it”, “You always let me down”. Adults should try to maintain their role and control their attitude, even if the child provokes them.
4. Unfulfilled promises
Many children are unmotivated and disappointed because parents offer them gifts or a prize if they fulfill their school obligations, as well as if they carry out an assignment at home or because of general obedience to them.
However, although they make an effort to acquire their prize, they do not obtain it, since their parents do not comply with the agreement. To prevent this from happening, it is best for seniors to be realistic about offering rewards and, of course, to honor them.
5. Not setting clear limits
Often, the frequent mistakes in the education of the children are due to not having a defined objective on how to educate them. Therefore, parents are not consistent with their criteria and not in setting norms.
When children are young, it is easier to solve the difficulties they present. However, in adolescence, control and authority are lost, which makes it more difficult for them to comply with the established guidelines. It is best to set specific rules and regulations that are possible to obey.
6. Be friends with the children
It is a mistake to treat children as friends, since the role of parents must be exercised. Children need to have that authority figure that parents must display. Logically, always within the framework of good treatment and mutual trust.
7. Bad example
Usually parents ask their children not to do things because they are bad. However, then the children watch them perform them. These inconsistencies are harmful and negatively affect the minor. Likewise, it undermines the legitimacy of the parent’s authority and undermines moral strength.
Suggestions for raising children
Finally, we will present some ideas that you can put into practice so that you do not make the frequent mistakes in raising your children that we mentioned before.
- Set clear and reasonable limits; it is an act of deep love.
- Children require structure, order, and fixed rules.
- Allow them to experience the consequences of their actions, as this facilitates their autonomy and independence.
- Give them obligations according to their age.
- Do not let undesirable behaviors pass that, in the long run, generate bad behavior.
In short, frequent errors in the education of children result in bad behaviors that are carried into adulthood. By identifying these mistakes, you can avoid them with your children and thus achieve successful parenting.
