Don’t Project Your Broken Dreams Onto Your Children
Broken dreams are those that we cannot achieve for one reason or another. When it comes to being parents, many times we want our children to make reality what we could not.
This is of no benefit to our children. Although we believe that our dreams can inspire them and give them a better life, we must not impose on our children a path that they have not chosen for themselves.
Your children are not to blame for not fulfilling your dreams, they have every right to choose their own path and they are not obliged to continue yours. In other words, everyone makes their own decisions in life.
While parents may have an idea of what their child might be like, they sometimes forget to take into account his abilities, qualities, opinions, ideas, and personality when thinking about tomorrow.
Parents who project their broken dreams onto children are not going to get anything out of it. Because even if the child does what his parents force him to do, the satisfaction will never be the same. On the other hand, these parents self-sabotage the opportunity to experience personal growth.
Consequences of imposing broken dreams on children:
- Low self-esteem.
- Distrust in themselves (and in others).
- Anxiety.
- Laziness
- Unsafety.
- Depression.
- Bad decision making.
Why do some parents project their broken dreams onto their children? These parents do so unconsciously as they continually view their children as an extension of themselves. They want their own wishes fulfilled at any cost, and they forget to live their own lives.
The worst thing about projecting broken dreams onto your children
They will hate what has been imposed on them
Andre Kirk Agassi is a former American tennis player who was forced to play tennis every night because his father had always dreamed of having a successful tennis career.
Agassi said openly in his autobiography that he did not like tennis. Although it gave him a career and a good lifestyle, he feels a great resentment towards the sport because he was forced to play it without feeling passion towards it.
Is it really important for a child to fulfill the wishes of their parents just because they did not have the opportunity to carry it out? NOT. Children must have their own tastes and interests.
They will be unhappy adults
When children are pressured to adjust to their parents’ wants and needs, it can lead to children becoming unhappy and incomplete adults.
In addition, these children will become emotionally fragile and often struggle their entire lives to find meaning or meaning outside of themselves. So they can never find happiness in themselves because of the emotional emptiness they feel inside.
The importance of teaching them to think for themselves
It is very important to teach children to think for themselves, because that way they can become healthy and happy adults.
If you love your children, support them in what they like. You must allow them to have both responsibility and control over their decisions, and you must also encourage them to follow their own passions and dreams.
Because, at the end of the day, the important thing will always be to honor, care for and respect your true self. In other words, allow your children to be authentic.
Get in touch with what your children feel. For this it is important to observe and have an open mind as they grow and discover their true calling, their interests and aspirations.
Bet on unconditional love and acceptance. Let your children know that you will always support them and care about their well-being.
