Educate Without Threats
Educating without threats may be the only way to correct your child’s behavior. The implantation of threats usually causes the opposite, since they cause your child, instead of obeying, to behave even worse.
Threats are not considered a useful parenting tool, as they lead to power struggles, arguments, and your child being discouraged.
In addition, threatening the child robs him of learning opportunities. Especially if you use them as the absolute only way to get him to cooperate.
At that time, everything your child practices will be for compliance, and this, in the long term, will seriously affect his self-esteem and everything related to his psycho-emotional health.
Children hate threats, so the only thing that you will achieve is that they seek greater independence or that you provoke conflict situations.
We recommend that when you declare that you carry out a penalty or consequence, you better make sure that it is something that you can comply with.
Also remember that an irrational threat, or one that is out of proportion to the offense , will not teach your child anything about the realistic consequences of his behavior.
When parents choose to educate without threats, they gain in health and well-being, not only for themselves but also for their children. This allows much healthier bonds to be created and, therefore, a more harmonious environment that enhances the best qualities of all.
5 tips to stop educating without threats
Sometimes educating without threats is not an easy task for many parents. Many moms have trouble feeling like they are in charge if their child doesn’t do what they ask and end up threatening them to cooperate. These are some tips with which you will avoid the use of threats and achieve the necessary objectives:
1. Avoid the power struggle
Being the role model in your child’s life begins with deciding not to let their behavior or misbehavior make them lose their cool. When you need your child to carry out a task, the little one will perceive the power it has to satisfy or retain your need.
By examining the often irrational thoughts that fuel our discomfort, we lessen their effect on us that fuels drama, threats, and bribery. Instead of approaching the child to do something, go along with him, acknowledging his reluctance without judging or criticizing.
2. Gain control of your emotions
If you are able to manage your own emotions and reactions, you will be less inclined to use logic to convince them of the importance of taking an action, and you will be more able to obtain their cooperation naturally, with silent authority.
When parents don’t need their children to behave in a certain way to feel in charge and not trigger power struggles with them, they are genuinely in charge.
3. Stay confident and safe
Staying safe and confident will confirm your leadership position and reduce possible states of rebellion for your little one. When your child perceives you as stable and trustworthy, regardless of whether they are naughty or pleasant, you satisfy their need to feel cared for and protected. In general, children are happiest when they have someone who guides them safely and without fuss.
4. Discuss negative consequences ahead of time
You must explain the negative consequences of breaking the rules in a timely manner. Use time-out, remove privileges, or use logical consequences to help him learn from his mistakes.
Consider which consequences are most effective, even though those that work well for one child may not work for another. Plan the same consequences for the offense. If you have the appropriate consequences for the actions, you will not feel so bad carrying out the punishments.
5. Give notice
As your child serves the punishment for disrespect and misbehavior, don’t be afraid to give him warnings. Because they have received punishments in the past, they will know that the warnings are serious and will begin to respond to them.
You should normally give three warnings before punishing him for his behavior. Keep in mind that in time, most children will stop with one or two warnings.
Educating without threats is easier than it seems. It’s all about doing a little bit of our part and knowing how healthy it is to treat a child firmly.
Let us remember that they not only need us to learn their duties but also to receive affection and understanding.
