Negotiation In Adolescence
The adolescent period is one of the most delicate stages of children’s lives, as it is a time when they begin to be more rebellious and provocative with their elders. In fact, with the different physical and psychological changes, in addition to the frequent frustrations, adolescents may not be able to assume their obligations and behave in the appropriate way.
Certainly, if you want to have a certain order in the family, it is necessary to know how to negotiate with your adolescent children. The task seems difficult because negotiations can generate conflicts and can scare many parents, fearing the possibility of losing authority.
Therefore, the first thing you should consider before starting the negotiation with a teenager is that it is a long-term project and that it requires a lot of effort. However, this is not an impossible mission; There are some tips that can be helpful when negotiating with a teenager.
How to manage negotiation in adolescence?
Here are some aspects that you must take into account to achieve successful negotiation in adolescence. Take note!
1. Show your authority
The first thing to keep in mind when negotiating with your teen is to always show authority. This means that it should be clear that this is not a power struggle as equals. Therefore, it is important to set the limits that your child should not pass in any negotiation.
In the same way, there are some non-negotiable situations, such as the time to get up, visits to family members or the obligation to do homework. Imposing your authority is a way to establish priorities, educate and establish internal codes in the nucleus of the family.
2. Make boundaries clear
Setting limits does not always mean forbidding your child to do what he likes, but mainly to negotiate with him. To negotiate a limit, communication and debate are the best way to reach an agreement; The consequences should also be discussed in advance if the imposed limit is not respected.
As the adolescent becomes more responsible and understands the risks associated with set limits, it will be possible to renegotiate some of them, which should always be appropriate for parents.
3. Respect their choices
To negotiate effectively with your teen, what you need to do is argue, listen, and compromise. Obviously, the key goal of a negotiation is to find common ground and show the young man that you trust him and respect his opinions and choices.
It is true that at certain times it is difficult to remain calm and listen carefully to their demands, sometimes exaggerated. However, your main goal as a mother is to help her make the right decisions and respect them. You must be armed with patience, listening and respect.
4. Create a middle ground
The goal of negotiation in adolescence is not to establish peace, but to deal with difficulties in finding a common solution. Despite the differences in perceptions, it is important to find a middle ground with your child through negotiation.
Also, you should not mind giving in, as long as it is to achieve a goal. In many cases, one step back is two steps forward. If you consider that it is positive for the resolution of the conflict, do not hesitate to approach positions with your adolescent son.
5. Find a pleasant environment
Finally, it is advisable to find a pleasant environment to maintain the negotiation with your child, since it is one of the keys to being successful. Find a favorable space, in which you will not have distractions and you feel comfortable.
The context in which you carry out the conversation can determine the results of the gathering. Therefore, do not hesitate to choose a place that helps to give the importance that the meeting deserves.
Finally, remember that negotiation in adolescence allows parents and adolescents to understand each other. Although there will be challenges and struggles ahead in this negotiation process, there is also the joy of watching your child grow into a thoughtful adult, with whom it is possible to have a reasonable discussion and debate.
