When A Woman Is A Mother She Thinks Twice: For Herself And For Her Children

When a woman is a mother, her worries are multiplied by two, her happiness is squared, and the sadness or insecurities of yesteryear are divided in half.

This strange but complex mathematical-emotional formula, beyond what one may think, is going to be like that for a lifetime, regardless of whether our child is already an adult … Wherever they are, we will always worry about them, our children will always be our little piece. of the heart outside the body.

At first glance, this accumulation of pressures, fears and worries can be somewhat stressful. However, we cannot forget that there is an optimal and ideal level of anxiety with which we always keep our gaze and our mind alert. We become almost like those birds that look at the world from above, with their wings wide open and their eyes awake to detect any danger, to glimpse any opportunity.

Likewise, we cannot neglect the role of parents as well. They think twice, suffer three times, and go out of their way for their family. However, from the first moment a woman discovers that she is pregnant, an inexplicable splitting is experienced. We are no longer one person, we are two.

We no longer conceive of our individuality and identity in the same way. Thus, our brain, with all its chemical and hormonal changes, will also predispose us to intensify emotions, thoughts, worries, doubts much more …

However, this whole process must be assumed as something normal and natural that must be managed properly. Thinking twice is good, it allows us to be more effective, skilled and protective… but be careful, thinking too much is no longer recommended. Our anxiety level will go beyond that optimal efficiency curve to enter an unhealthy stress process.

A woman who is a worried mother and her superpowers

Today’s mother is usually an independent woman, with a job and who is also up to date on parenting issues. This makes your mind more like a multitasking computer attentive to any stimulus, interested in any information and in turn pending that schedule that marks the routines, obligations and objectives to be met.

Mom is biologically “prepared” so that nothing escapes her

• To say that moms acquire superpowers during parenting is an understatement.
• Thus, something really interesting that a report entitled “ Mother-child communication: attachment bond ” revealed to us, prepared by experts from the University of Navarra, is that motherhood stimulates intelligence as well as sensory skills.
• All this is achieved for a very specific purpose: to be more successful in raising children.

• Experts in perinatal psychology tell us that thanks to new neuroimaging techniques we have discovered that the areas associated with the cognitive-affective system were activated much more. 
• In addition, something interesting that has been found is that the first months of pregnancy the ovaries produce between 10 and 100 times more progesterone, which cuts the production of cortisol, the stress trigger. This is so for a very simple reason: high and uncontrolled stress damages the fetus.

Also, something that we should discard right now is the classic idea that the woman who is a mother or who has just given birth experiences a certain slowness or mental dullness. It is flatly false.

Katherine Ellison, Pulitzer Prize Winner and author of ” Mommy’s Brain: How Motherhood Makes Us Smarter, ” says the opposite is true. Motherhood flips an amazing switch in our brain: it allows us to be more alert, more intuitive and more receptive to any stimulus.

Think twice, worry about your baby but never neglect yourself

We must not lose sight of an essential fact: motherhood puts our level of attention to the maximum, however, this level of anxiety long maintained over time can be exhausting.

Rest from time to time, and above all, prioritize yourself will never be a cardinal sin but a vital necessity. No one is a bad mother for taking an afternoon off, for letting dad fulfill the same role as you, no one should criticize you if you decide to take a nap or if there are housework to do and you choose to spend a relaxed afternoon with your child and others moms.

• It is simply about having clear priorities, and those priorities are your family and you are.
• Also avoid letting yourself be carried away by excessive worry, by ruminant thoughts and above all, by the fear that your child will not leave the diaper when he should, will not walk when he plays or does not talk about running when he is three years old. Everything will come in due time, in due course and when your baby’s maturation is propitious.
• On the other hand, we must also prevent second people from infecting us with their worries, fears or anxieties. If the upbringing and education of a child is complex enough, avoid carrying burdens that are not yours and pressures from others that do not belong to you.

In conclusion. Feeling fear, thinking a lot, having doubts and concerns, is something normal when you are a mother. However, never forget this fact: you are well prepared to do it wonderfully well.